Plant Killer!!!

I didn’t think it was possible to kill a day-lily, I managed to do it.

I have always wanted to be one of those mystical magical women that can make plants grow and have beautiful luscious gardens with fresh spring peas and tasty tomatoes. I picture myself in something long and flowey, floating through my living pulsing garden, smelling my wondrous blooms and touching the velvety leaves.
There is something so satisfying about watching a plant grow, and something so depressing about watching it die. One of the women at work gave me a day-lily plant from her garden, she said she had scads of them and had to divide some because they had taken over a part of her garden. I was so excited! This plant seemed inviolable! So I planted it in a beautiful cobalt-blue pot and put it on the doorstep. I was careful not to over water, I put it out to get some of the spring rain and moved it into the morning sun. I was sure this was the plant. I would have flowers soon for sure.

Nope.

I went away on a business trip and when I came home it was yellow and dead, it even looks like it got some sort of fungus. I can’t do this.

I have one plant I’ve been able to keep alive for a few years now, a Buddha Belly, or Mexican Bottle Plant. This plant looks like a stick. When I first got it there were pretty orange flowers and it would get big leaves as big as my hand. I panicked when all the leaves and flowers fell off, but I read about the plant and found it has a dormant period. So I patiently waited and when spring came, little buds emerged! I was so proud it had come back to life!
I still get leaves but I have not seen any flowers for about 2 years. I love my little plant, I wish it would show me some more orange flowers, but I love it anyway because it has managed to survive me!

Does anybody want to adopt my Dwarf Meyer Lemon tree? I don’t think it will make it much longer.